


walking on these weary bones

by persephonerights



Series: song drabbles [2]
Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Based on a song, character introspection, i love my angry boy :(
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:42:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23772502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/persephonerights/pseuds/persephonerights
Summary: Dirtyhands was born and raised in the dirtiest parts of Ketterdam. Everyone knew that he was a ruthless man, a demon, one that was powerful. They didn’t see him in his office as the sun rose. The way he clutched his leg, hissing in pain. Darkness followed him, but no one was allowed to know deep it was.When darkness fell on the city, and he was alone, Kaz tried not to feel. Suppressed the memory of his brother’s smile, the way he laughed when they arrived in Ketterdam, ready to start their new life of riches and fame. Tried to suppress the memory of his brother’s body, and the look on Pekka’s face as he robbed them blind. Except he didn’t suppress all of it, he allowed the darkness to seep in, allowed himself to feel the anger at Pekka and any man who crossed them, any person who kept slaves.A character introspection fic about Kaz Brekker, set to the tune of Get Down by Avi Kaplan
Series: song drabbles [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1705894
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	walking on these weary bones

_ When the rain is all I see _

_ And the black clouds coming for me _

_ Thunder-roll got me on my knees _

_ But then I'm back on my feet no stopping _

Dirtyhands was born and raised in the dirtiest parts of Ketterdam. Everyone knew that he was a ruthless man, a demon, one that was powerful. They didn’t see him in his office as the sun rose. The way he clutched his leg, hissing in pain. Darkness followed him, but no one was allowed to know deep it was. 

When darkness fell on the city, and he was alone, Kaz tried not to feel. Suppressed the memory of his brother’s smile, the way he laughed when they arrived in Ketterdam, ready to start their new life of riches and fame. Tried to suppress the memory of his brother’s body, and the look on Pekka’s face as he robbed them blind. Except he didn’t suppress all of it, he allowed the darkness to seep in, allowed himself to feel the  _ anger  _ at Pekka and any man who crossed them, any person who kept slaves. 

Then, when the anger felt like it permeated every part of him he would get up, and go back to his desk with the help of his cane. And he would sit and plot. As time went on, and this became his life, Inej would crawl through the window to receive her new assignment, and for a second the darkness lifted, and his shoulders felt lighter. 

_ Ain't nothing gonna take my fire _

_ Ain't nothing gonna crush my soul _

_ Nobody gonna make me a liar _

_ Gonna get up if I get down low, yeah _

Pekka and Jan Van Eck would regret crossing Kaz and his friends. They thought that once they “crushed” his plan that he would fall in line. Or make a mistake. But these men were old timers, they had no idea what people like his crew had in store for them. They thought that he was done. That a man like him wasn’t running hundreds of games, all at once. 

He had promised many people many things, and he wouldn’t let these men make a liar of him. Most people didn’t know it, or notice it, but there was a difference between Dirtyhands and Kaz Brekker. And Pekka Rollins was going to have to acknowledge this soon. And he would regret making an enemy of him. 

_ Walking on these weary bones _

_ Stepping down that lonely road _

_ And again I'm getting close _

_ To the end of my rope, and I'll hold it _

Kaz Brekker lived a routine life, as much as he could, and it ended every day in the darkness of his own office, sinking into his chair. Everyday the leg pained him more, but he still wouldn’t get it fixed. The weariness settled over him, like a familiar embrace. At one point it had lifted, when he was on that damned boat and in that damned hotel with his crew. But the crew was no more. 

He had gang members who were loyal to him, some he might even consider his companions. But they weren’t the same as being surrounded by his friends. He usually didn’t allow himself to think about what he lost when he ran missions, but this time it was inevitable. 

Inej being gone felt like he was missing a piece, not that he would ever fucking admit it. But there was power here. And he was accomplishing something. People in this city saw his empire and called for his head, saying that he must be a cruel man to have all this. And they were right. 

But the city was being cleaned up, whether they knew it or not. The Lions were disappearing and less slave ships were coming into the Harbour. Inej was ruthless and efficient, same as him. And despite their separation they were on the same wavelength and this city had no idea what to do with them. 

One day Inej would return, and the city would be brought to heel, and Wylan would rise through the ranks, and would learn Kaz’s tricks. Their team would be unstoppable, and the city would regret trying to find the end of Kaz’s patience. 

_ Get down and get down _

_ But I keep on climbing up _

_ Don't matter if the wolves start calling _

_ Don't matter how much I'm falling yeah _

Kaz started in the Kerch as a weak boy, who wasn’t necessarily good at what he did. But he grew. And he grew. Everytime he was knocked down, he raised up stronger and smarter than the person who knocked him down. 

The more powerful people in the city underestimated the teenage boy, and suffered the consequences. He was cold, and rose through the ranks. The people of the underground called for his blood, wanted him to relent, stop taking over their territories. 

He fell deeper and deeper into the life, and he revelled in it. The freefall made him rejoice in the power, but Inej, Jesper, Wylan, Nina, and Matias brought him a bit of lightness. Even as they fell with him. 

The rose with him, to the top. They climbed out from the bottom of the pile and ended up on top. And the view was good. 

_ Get down and get down _

_ But I keep on climbing up _

**Author's Note:**

> i hope this was in-character (first six of crows fic) and i hope you liked it! please consider leaving kudos and comments if you did! :)


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